Dr. Smith and I frequently talk about trends in our practice and how we can meet the needs of the community. We had the first day of our anxiety group on Wednesday, and both of us noted the intensity and quantity of worries stated by the children in the group. These findings yesterday parallel what we have both seen with other individual clients in our practice. We are seeing both children and adults with increased worries and stress. Notably, in group, we heard worries about illness, parental divorce, friendships, academics, terrorism, kidnappings, being embarrassed, being alone, and getting lost, among others.
In the age of sunamis, terrorism, and shootings at schools, you can decrease anxiety and nervousenss in your child by limiting the time your child spends in front of the television and computer. Be sure to ask your child what questions they have about current events when you suspect your child has been exposed to media stories. Reassure them by explaining what simple things you do at home to keep your family safe and what school officials do to keep students safe during the day. Remind your child about how rare these scary events truly are, but do not provide false promises by telling your child that it will never happen.
What worries do you notice in your child? We'd love to hear your thoughts.
My children are 1yrs and 2.5yrs. Jak, the 1yr old has just this week started to look worried when he can not see me. Until this point, he has always been very happy to go to anyone and sit alone exploring his world. On a selfish level I love it; it makes me feel so important and special! On another level, I want him to learn that I am there if he truly needs me, but that he can be away from me and still be safe.
My 2.5yr old amazes me constantly with his ability to act as if he is 4yrs of age. His greatest question of the moment is not "WHY?" but "WHERE?" He seems to be putting his world into perspective with this question. Every answer I give to the where questions is followed by another where. He requires constant reinforcement and I am sure also reassurance that where is actually tangible! I perceive that he feels like a very small fish in an enormously big sea. So "where does he belong in this life?" is his greatest worry and "where is mummy?" when mummy is not in the room, but she can be heard talking in the hallway is the next concern.
I have a question back to you about the worries and stresses that children have today...
Do you think that children have greater stress and worry than children of previous generations or do you think the worries are just different? Since the beginning of time there has been the threat of murder, rape, major disasters, being left alone, tribal war to world war etc. Is the worry increased or are we just more apt to encourage our children to talk rather than to suppress their emotions and "get on with it"?
Thanks :)
--clare
<mailto:clarekneis@gmail.com>
--Jim B.
Clare also asked an important question about whether the prevalence of these anxieties in children is really new. I share Clare's sentiments that tragedies are not new to our generation, but I do think that advances in technology and media have given kids greater access to sensitive information they may not have previously had. I also think that new academic pressures in schools today and the tendency to over-schedule kids with sports and clubs adds complexity and puts a new threshold of stress in the lives of today's children. Given the whole, kids are more exposed, stressed and overwhelmed, and we see it in their behaviors and their responses. Luckily, we are also a generation that is encouraging kids to talk more and allowing them to share their emotions, at least that's what I hope.
--Dr. Bridget
<mailto:Drengel@FrontRangePsychology.com>
